Every now and then I think of someone who I never see anymore; this man had a huge impact on my life, and without him and his expertise I wouldn't be a mom.
Today I am grateful for Dr. William Dodds, our fertility specialist. I have never written about it here before, though I think I've eluded to it a few times, but Bryson and I encountered trouble conceiving. It wasn't all a surprise; we knew before we even began trying that my having polycystic ovarian syndrome (PCOS) was going to make a challenge. But we never expected it to go the way it did, taking nearly two years to get pregnant with Baylor and going through a bunch of procedures to get there. We learned about and went through things we couldn't pronounce, like "hysterosalpingogram". We tried intrauterine insemination (IUI) twice, I believe, with no baby. Finally, during a diagnostic laparoscopy, Dr. Dodds discovered stage four endometriosis, cleaned that out, and just over a month later I was sobbing in the bathroom with a plus sign in my hand. And through it all, I felt supported by this intensely caffeinated, optimistic, intelligent man who worked so hard to help us make the family we so desired.
Almost every year since I have sent him a Christmas card with a photo and an update on the family, and every year that I've written he has called to say he got it and that he is glad all is well. Not many doctors would take the time to do that, but that's just who Dr. Dodds is. And I am grateful for him.
On a side note: Infertility is an incredibly isolating experience; the disappointments and heartbreak make you feel like no one else could possibly understand what you are going through, and the jealousy you feel as you see friends and family have children is confusing and painful. I was lucky enough (if you can call it that) to have an aunt who went through a similar experience whom I was able to talk to. I know lots of people often suffer through this "process" alone, and I want to encourage anyone who reads this and who may be experiencing infertility issues to reach out to someone. I am always open to talking to people about this, but there are also many therapists and counselors who specialize in dealing with these issues. Please don't feel like you are alone; adding to the stress of the procedures and the emotional pain by isolating yourself could actually lengthen the time it takes to get pregnant. Reach out and you're likely to find someone who can help shoulder your worries.
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