Thursday, October 11, 2012

That's What They Said: Bodily Functions and Major Events

Here's another round of "That's What They Said"!  If you aren't okay with reading about bodily functions then you might want to skip this one.  Otherwise, enjoy!


Baylor: (excitedly while looking into the potty as it flushes)  Look!  It looks like poop in a tornado!


Baylor:  My brother was born in August.  (smiling)  He's so chubby!


Amalia:  (talking to her doll, Sally)  Say, "Ahhhh!"  There's a doctor at the dentist.
Me:  Yeah, actually the dentist is a doctor.  Dr. Stewart.
Amalia:  He a doctor?
Me:  Yup, Dr. Bruce Stewart.
Amalia:  That a silly name for a doctor!  (Then walks away laughing.)


(Baylor and I were in the Wendy's bathroom the other day.  He had just finished doing his number two business and was straining to pull up his pants when someone else came in the bathroom.  I looked at the new set of feet in the stall next to us and I could tell, given the style of shoes and pants, that this was an older lady.)
Me:  Baylor, come on, buddy, pull up your pants.
Baylor:  I need help.
(Then a tooting sound came from the stall next to us.)
Baylor:  (smiling and very loudly ...)  What was THAT?!
Me:  (smiling through the embarrassment)  Shhhhh!


Baylor: Oops!  Wait, Mom!
Me:  Baylor, what did you drop?
Baylor:  My booger!
Me:  Baylor, don't go back and get it!  It's with nature now.


Amalia:  What is Christmas?
Me:  Baylor, what day is Christmas?
Baylor:  25th.
Me:  Of what?
Baylor:  December.
Me:  Yup, Christmas is on December 25th.  It is a religious holiday, but our family celebrates it in a secular way.  (Then I realized I was way above their heads ...)  It is a time to get together with family and friends and celebrate love and the spirit of giving.  And that's why we give each other presents, or gifts, at Christmas.
Amalia:  Oh.
Me:  And ... Santa comes and brings presents to good little boys and girls!
Baylor:  AND boys and girls who like elevators!


Amalia:  I going to tell Santa I had a quesadilla for lunch.
Me:  Yeah?
Amalia:  Yeah, he will LOVE that.

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