Waiting for the Other Shoe to Drop ...

My sister is sick, really, really sick. Some sort of stomach bug has taken over her body and is wreaking havoc on her gastrointestinal system. She is currently restricted to the BRAT diet and is kinda down for the count.

And we hung out with her last night ... a lot.

So now, every last burp, abdominal pain, and awkward feeling (even if it's just the baby kicking) is being over-analyzed by my idiotic brain. I don't want to get sick, and I most definitely don't want Baylor to get sick.

But right now it feels like we're just waiting for the other shoe to drop.

Judge-y a Bit, Are We?

I sobbed as we left the house the other day. I sobbed so hard I think I scared my husband. Had we not needed gas, I would have cried for a lot longer. But we needed gas, I needed some water, and I had to use the bathroom so we stopped only a few minutes away at a gas station and I went into the store, red eyes and all.

After using their bathroom, I picked up some water, an A&W root beer, then made my way to the check out counter to pick up some small treats for the ride. The clerk smiled at me and asked if she could help me find anything.

"No, just looking for a little treat," I said.

"If you're interested in a healthier option, we have some trail mix on sale over here," she hinted back.

Um, judgey much? I smiled as politely as I could, held back all the snarky remarks that flooded my brain, and responded that I had plenty of healthy options in the car and that I just needed a little chocolate. (And I'm talking a little chocolate ... I got a couple over-sized Andes mints for my husband and me, and they are only 1.25" by 2.5".)

Hearing I had healthy options in the car, she actually seemed relieved and said, "Good!"

I have to say, I was pretty miffed that this clerk was openly judging me for my food and drink choices. (Just ask my husband.) It's not like I was getting alcohol, cigarettes, chewing tobacco, or even a king-sized candy bar. I ended up purchasing a bottle of water, the root beer, two of the little Andes mints, and a tiny box of Tropical Lemonheads and Friends. That's it. In the car, I had a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, a Fiber One bar, a couple Kashi TLC bars, an apple, and a bag of carrots, pretty healthy fare if I do say so myself.

What do you think? Am I totally overreacting? Or was this person sticking her nose in my business?

Away From b

This morning I rolled my achy body out of bed, waddled to the bathroom after collecting a mishmash of clothes to wear while I get ready, and turned on the light. As I looked at myself in the mirror, I melted into tears, watching them steadily stream down my face, lightly splish-splashing on the counter.

You see, today I am leaving my son in the care of my parents and sister for the day. Well, my husband and I are leaving him. I have a baby shower to go to on the other side of the state, and since a three-hour car ride each way would be torture for the little man (who already had to make a similar trek a couple weeks ago) we decided at the last minute last night to see if we could procure babysitters for him for the day. My mom jumped at the chance, and now Little B gets to spend the whole day with Oma, Grandpa E, and Aunt Christine instead of being schlepped here and there, cooped up in a car that holds no fun for him.

My family has watched him before, obviously, so why did this upset me so?

This will be the longest I have ever been away from my son since the day he was born. If we drove there, went to the shower, and drove back without stopping at all along the way either way, we'll be gone for nine hours. I'm pretty sure the longest I've ever left him with a babysitter is like three hours. So, as you can imagine, this day has become pretty daunting for me.

Through the haze of my tears, I started to think about a friend and something she did for the first time last night, and I'm trying to draw strength through her and through my own experience. My friend Andrea spent her first few hours alone, outside of the hospital, with her brand new son last night. She wrote on Facebook how nervous she was and how scary something so tiny can be. Her words brought me back to those first days when I stayed home alone with Baylor, how I didn't know exactly what I was doing and I was scared, but we did it. And we survived many, many days since.

I know I can do this today; it will be much harder on me than Little B, I'm sure. But it's good to get this first taste of separation under our belts because (deep breath, Nicole) I know there is a much bigger separation coming up in the not-so-distant future. A separation I am still struggling to fathom, let alone be okay with. So days like today, those important baby steps, are a good jumping-off-point to prepare me - and Baylor - for the few days when I'll be in the hospital, getting acquainted with a new little person.

Still ...

I better bring some touch-up makeup with me today. And lots and lots of tissue.

Billiard Fun!

This morning after breakfast, my son and I headed over to my parents' house to hang out with them while my husband did a presentation for a competition. We had fun, we ate lunch, and eventually my son and dad made their way downstairs to run around in the open area and enjoy a little music from the juke box.

Song selection is very important work.

My dad then got out a folding chair and showed my son the pool table. I know he's seen it before, but only from his low vantage point, probably never really knowing what was on top. Boy oh boy, did he enjoy that!

Pushing the balls down the table.

Inspecting them for color quality and general smoothness.

Trying to sink them in the pockets.

I mean, come on ... just look at those cheeks!

As it turns out, billiard balls are great learning tools, too! Little B was able to point out a few colors and numbers he knew!

Awesome new fun for Baylor and Grandpa E!

Opposites and Numbers

Today my son and I hung out at home, and the little man dazzled me with all his new tricks. During lunch, he all of a sudden started saying all of the opposites he knew:

"Up!" ... "Down."

"In!" ... "Out!"

"On." ... "Off!"

Then he'd just smile at me. I tried to explain how they were opposites, but he just wanted to say them over and over again.

We also played with coasters today, and Baylor decided to show off his counting skills. He had already dumped all the coasters onto the floor, then when I showed up he picked them up one by one and ever-so-quietly counted, "One, two, three, four, five, six, seven." Two and three sounded a bit alike, as did four and five, but he did a really good job nonetheless.

I'm so proud of him! I can't believe how much he changes every single day and how lucky I am to be able to witness it all.

A Scale, A Trapezoid, and Two Pink Balls

Baylor and I had dinner with my mom and sister last night, and - as usual - it's never a dull evening with the little man.

Upon his arrival at their house, he sped to the bathroom to bring out their digital scale. He loves anything digital, but this is particularly fun because it's so interactive. Of course, he needed help working it properly.

He actually weighed in at a scant 24.4 pounds, but he seemed satisfied.

And for some reason last night he was all about the bear stance; feet and hands on floor, butt in the air. It made for a cute picture or two, though.

After dinner, he pulled out his new favorite puzzle at Oma and Grandpa E's house. It's a Melissa and Doug wooden shape puzzle. Though simple in design, it has apparently proved to be very educational for him.

Now, I know this is going to sound like bragging, and basically that's all it is, but my kiddo appears to be a genius! We asked him to pick up the shapes, and after only playing with it a handful of times in the past couple weeks, he was able to identify a circle, square, triangle, oval (his favorite), rectangle, rhombus, trapezoid, and pentagon. He got a little tripped up on the octagon, but I think he got it later in the night. We didn't even tell him what color things were ... he just picked them out by name all on his own! And yes, I was beaming (and in shock) the entire time.

For some reason, Baylor has always loved these breast cancer awareness racquetballs my mom had around the house. The pink lid, the canister, and the little pink balls themselves ... all are mystical and magical in his eyes.

He likes to shake the balls in the canister, spin the empty canister, spin the lid, bounce the balls, watch Grandpa E bounce the balls to the ceiling and back, throw the balls as hard as he can ... anything goes!

Needless to say, we had a good time.

Eating Apples with My Boy

My little man and I got a lot done this morning even though I was feeling a bit under the weather. We did a few loads of laundry (he helped take stuff out of the dryer and directed me on how to start up a new wash load), took stuff to the dry cleaners, then headed to our local apple orchard for a half peck of new apples.

I had been sticking with Cameos, but there weren't many bags left and that made me wonder if they were any good anymore. So I bought Jonagolds (I think) instead ... we'll see how they taste once we get to them.

In the meantime, Baylor and I shared an apple when we got home. It was lovely.


I cut his up into little bits (see them there in front of his bib) and he goes to town. Now that he's got four molars, he chews them much better and things move a bit more quickly, thank goodness!

Patiently waiting for Mama to peel and slice another bit of apple. What a good little boy!

The Cameo was fantastic, and I can safely say we both enjoyed it thoroughly.

I hope you all are having a delicious day!

(I don't remember if I've posted this piece of advice before - and my computer is being too slow for me to check it out - but the lady who owns the orchard near us told me that the best way to keep apples fresh is to take them out of the bag, put them in the crisper, then cover them with a damp towel. Apparently they stay fresher longer if they are kept in a humid environment. Who knew?)

Operation Tick Tock: Check and Check

I crossed a couple things off my Tick Tock list today:

First, I scrubbed my son's non-skid bathtub mat with bleach (wearing gloves and a mask) to get all the gunk off the suction cups. It looks all shiny and new! Yay!

And second, I caulked a couple more areas of our bathroom that I had skipped during the first ant removal attempt. Apparently if you take away their main point of entry they'll find another, so the spot I didn't do all of a sudden became a problem. *sigh* Oh well, it's done. If that doesn't fix it, I might go crazy. Just warning you.

That's it. Just thought I'd share and keep holding myself accountable for getting this stuff done. (Though if I was really going to put myself out there, I'd put the list up wouldn't I? Hm ... not quite sure I'm ready for that yet.)

Owl

During a recent shopping trip, my mom told me that she was interested in taking Baylor to Build-A-Bear. I didn't see the harm in it, so we decided to check it out. The store was a bit busy, but once we got to the wall of animals he didn't seem to notice. Mom asked what I thought he should have, and I said that one of the two (a dog or a bear) with shorter fur would probably be best because then he wouldn't try to pull the fur out with his teeth. Little B wasn't at all interested in either animal though. Then, we came upon the owl. Ahh, the owl. It was love at first sight, and Baylor took to him immediately, hugging the little empty shell of a stuffed animal. Though it had pretty much the longest fur of any of the animals, he loved it so much I couldn't say no and we wheeled over to the line to get Owl stuffed.

It did not go well, to say the least.

The instant we took Owl away, though promising to give him back, Baylor went ballistic. Clinging to Aunt Christine, he was horrified as the salesperson shoved the metal stuffing tube into Owl's back and started poking around to fill him.



Then she stopped the noisy filling machine and started sewing him up ... and the sobbing continued.

Finally, my traumatized little guy was reunited with his furry friend.

We didn't even bother to buy Owl any clothes because Baylor didn't care and wouldn't give him up to be dressed. The clerk even had to walk around and pull the tag off of him so she could scan it because Baylor was clinging onto him so tightly.

As we walked out of the store, Little B fell into a sort of exhausted lull, snuggling with his Owl.

After a minute or two, he snapped out of it and started exploring Owl's face. "Eye." "No." (Nose.)

And then, well he was just the happiest boy on Earth!

Kiddo loves his new stuffed animal SO much! Though at first I wanted to name him Hootie, we decided to just call him Owl because Baylor can actually say it. And say it he does ... in the two days he has been in our family, Owl has pretty much gone everywhere with us. Every time Baylor sees him, he breaks out into a huge grin and runs for him. It's adorable, to say the least.

Ravenous at 30 Weeks ...

I had another OB appointment on Friday, and I thought I'd give you guys the skinny on my stats. Here they are ... read 'em and weep.

Blood pressure: 96/? (I couldn't read the screen quickly enough)
Weight at last visit: 158 lbs.
Weight at current visit: 161 lbs.
Starting weight (approx.): 128 lbs.
Glucose Tolerance Results: PASSED!!

Apparently a bunch of my OB's patients failed their glucose tolerance test that day, so initially she thought I was in that group. But the freaked-out look on my face told her that she might be wrong, so she checked and I was well in the clear. Whew!

I only gained three pounds, so I got a metaphorical gold star for my efforts at eating better. Thank goodness too, because I have been absolutely ravenous lately and would have been totally bummed if I had deprived myself a little bit only to have gained a ton of weight.

When I say I have been ravenous lately, I mean it. I eat dinner, I'm still hungry. I have a snack, I could eat a meal. I feel like I could eat ALL DAY LONG. This is a little unusual for someone at this point in a pregnancy; usually the baby starts to take up more space and makes you feel fuller faster. However, for me, this wasn't the case when I was pregnant with Little B and it's not the case now.

I literally want to wear a sign around my neck that says "FEED ME!!!". I'd never take it off.

The last two days haven't been superb eating-wise, so I have to get back on the wagon, so to speak. More apples and carrots, fewer sweets. Last night in particular, I went to take off my compression socks (sexy, huh?) and I had the worst muffin top knees I have had in a while. I think my water weight gain is starting up, though hopefully it won't get as bad as last time (I'll try to find a picture of my feet from my last pregnancy to demonstrate). The compression socks help, if only so I can continue to see my ankles day in and day out. Sadly, the socks are open toe, so after having shifted throughout the day I end up with muffin tops for feet as well as knees. Stellar.

So that's where I am. Questions? Comments? Concerns? (Grandma and Aunt Marty, I know you're probably concerned about how much I'm eating, but trust me, I'd pass out if I didn't eat as much as I do.)

Have a wonderful day!